10 September 1999 - 11:15pm
I'm not very happy right now. In fact, I've been a little sad for most of the day.
My best friend of 21 years is about to go off to East Timor and risk life and limb
to prevent them from being oppressed by the Indonesians. He's in the army, and
will soon be going off to fight a war - although I hope it doesn't get to that stage. I
don't want him to be in a situation where he can end up dead, and so my day
today hasn't been a very happy one.
I saw the news last night where they were saying that the government has decided to commit to over 5000 troops. That's almost the entire army! I had to
call him to find out what was happening to him, and he told me that he was going
as well. After speaking to him for a little while, I let him go after giving him my
love and regards, and telling him to keep his head down.
I spoke to a friend of mine tonight (just a few minutes ago), via ICQ, and tried to
talk to her about my feelings, but all I got from her was to stop eating meat, and
I'd save his life. Not what I wanted to hear... she wasn't very happy with my
response and logged off.
Ah well... onto brighter subjects.
Some car salesman rang me during the week and enquired as to how close I was to getting my Ford Fairmont. I'm still about a month away, but he wanted to
sell me a Fairmonts that wasn't what I was after. I want one with a body kit and
sports kit, and hopefully a sunroof as well, but he wanted to sell me a standard
one that had come in. I told him to call me back when he had what I wanted.
Car salesmen... ya just gotta keep 'em in their place. *grin*
Missy was here on the weekend just gone. Unfortunately it was a quick visit.
She got here on the Saturday afternoon and left Sunday afternoon. When she
got here, she came to see me at my work, and we went home and had a spa for
a couple of hours. That was nice and relaxing. We set it up this time so it
wasn't as humid at the end of it, and so she didn't faint this time. *smile*
Afterwards we had dinner at her favourite Chinese restaurant, and then went to do
a lingerie party for some friends of mine. As it turned out, they had set up a
barbecue and full catering for us and their other guests, but they forgot to tell us.
So there they were, preparing this huge, delicious dinner and snacks, and we
were full... very frustrating. As it was, I managed to overcome my feelings of
fullness, and ate some delicious barbecued chicken and other foods.
Mmmm.... The highlight of the evening was a display and sales pitch of some naughty
toys... like dildos and vibrators and edible oils and stuff... fascinating stuff.
Comments like, "Oh my God, it's a monster!" were not uncommon...
Her and I came back home after the party and drank bourbon and coke in the half
dark and enjoyed each other's company. It was really nice to spend time with
her... I love her so much, it's just incredible.
The next morning she went to get some stuff from the shop for breakfast, and ended up coming back with some McDonald's breakfast... that was a bit of a
surprise... but it was funny too. We sat in front of the TV watching music videos
and eating breakfast burgers... nice and romantic. Hahaha. We went to the
cinema at lunchtime, after picking up another of my close friends who hadn't met
her yet, and we all went to see Arlington Rd. What a strange but interesting
movie. We all enjoyed it. We took my friend back home, and then returned to
my place. I gave her a massage to see her on her way, and then we said our
It really is getting a little easier to say goodbye. I think that this long-distance
relationship issue is beginning to be something both of us are getting used to. I
think the greatest challenge to us in the early stages was that we were still
getting used to each other, and we were really getting into enjoying each other's
company so much, that it was much harder to say goodbye. It was almost like a
painful separation each time. I don't know how it was for her, but for me it was
hard like that because there was the time of wonder and magic with her, and that
was suddenly ending - would it continue? Would I see her again? When I did,
would we feel the same way about each other? Would the distance and time
apart make the feelings grow weaker?
Time is showing that it's not that way at all. And we both know how much we care for each other, and we're both committed to a wonderful future with each
other. I think we're both understanding that saying goodbye for a week or two is
not the 'separation' that it used to feel like. We're there for each other, and
always will be, and it feels just fantastic.
During the week I set up a mailing list for some friends. It's basically just to let
us all exchange witty comments amongst ourselves and hassle out one
particular person... he loves it. Gives him some incentive to come up with some
good comebacks of his own. On the first day, there were only 5 of us subscribed
to it, and we managed to do close to 40 emails between us on that day! One of
us was overcome with horror about how many emails they were receiving and
decided they didn't want to be part of it. I think yesterday it got to about 60 or
more... However, I think the excitement has died down, and today there was
only about 5-10 emails. But then, it was a Friday, and with some of them being
public servants they were probably asleep or gone home before lunch time.
The week has also proven to be interesting in more ways than what I've described
so far. A couple of weeks ago, I was 'approached' on ICQ by someone who had
been reading my journal. They were impressed with what I'd written and wanted
to talk to me. Her and I quickly found a common interest, being spirituality and
philosophy, and we spent hours talking about that over ICQ. A few days later we
met for a coffee and got to meet each other. It was funny for me, because I felt a
little uncomfortable meeting her like that. I was used to meeting strange women
to get to know them for the possibility of having a relationship with them... as
single guys do. However, this time I was meeting a woman only because we had
things in common and friendship was all that I was interested in. The
uncomfortableness I was feeling was because I wasn't sure if friendship was all
she wanted, and I was looking for signs that she was interested in more than
friendship. Happily for me, I didn't see those signs. We've become good friends
However, the main reason I introduced you to her in this way is because when I found out from her that she was looking for a guy to go out with or just for fun, I
introduced her to one of my friends... who shall remain nameless to protect the
innocent... of which he's not! Hehehe. The method of introduction was unique
for me, which is why I'm talking about it here.
I introduced them via ICQ, and they spoke to each other during the day. That night they met, with my friend going over to her place. They just talked for a few hours. When he returned home, they both jumped online and they started
talking to me and to each other. Each of them was asking me questions about
the other, and I was the 'middle-man' in the 2-3 hour conversation. It's like I was
a chaperone or something, and I was giving each of them information that one
wanted to tell the other, but were too shy to tell them themselves. So thanks to
me, they got intimate over ICQ... but through me! It was weird, but funny. He
ended up going over to her place again that night... and stayed until dawn. My
job was done, and they enjoyed themselves some more. hehehe.
The next day, my friend Tricia (who lives in Melbourne), who has been mentioned
in here before, sent me an email, desperately asking for help to find a man for
her. I introduced her to the same friend that I've been talking about in the
paragraph above, because she had a list of specifications that I thought he would
fulfil. And so they've been happily exchanging emails since, and intend on
meeting in a week or two.
What a strange week it's been!
Of a certainty
the man who can see
all creatures in himself,
himself in all creatures,
knows no sorrow.